


Self Control

by bellevilleNJ



Category: The Heroes of Olympus - Rick Riordan
Genre: Angst?, College AU, First Kiss, Fluff, M/M, Mutual Pining, One Shot, all their friends know they like each other, but does things that make him anxious just so he can hang out with will, can u tell i have a way bigger story built up around this in my head, idk how to tag, nico has anxiety, stoner!nico, too bad i only have the attention span to write the most fun chapter, will runs track
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-11-21
Updated: 2019-11-21
Packaged: 2021-02-25 22:49:04
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,747
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21513307
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/bellevilleNJ/pseuds/bellevilleNJ
Summary: Everyone knows Nico doesn’t go to parties. Everyone except from Will, that is, ‘cause every time he’s ever invited Nico to one, he’s shown up.
Relationships: Nico di Angelo/Will Solace
Comments: 2
Kudos: 112





	Self Control

**Author's Note:**

> i have never published a fic before this has been sitting on my phone since like 4 months ago when i had a weird 2 days of frenzied writing for the first time since my english gcse exams. title is in reference to the frank ocean song

It was getting late. Will craned his neck over the throng of people, still scanning the crowd for that one head of dark hair at everyone else’s shoulder level. He knew Nico hated parties, and often wondered why he still bothered showing up. He always did though, despite usually hovering around the corners until Will would pull him into a drinking game or force him to dance, and he had said that he was coming tonight. 

‘I haven’t seen him yet,’ Piper offered up without asking. She wasn’t even looking at him, too focused on concocting her perfect blend of vodka, cola, and lime juice, and Will half-heartedly considered feigning confusion. Before he could object, though, his eyes snagged on a small frame weaving its way through the mass of people. 

He let out a breath he didn’t know he was holding and watched as a tall languid figure cut across Nico’s path and held him in place. With a kind of detached interest, Will observed their interaction. Nico seemed a little like he was somewhere else; his eyes kept breaking contact and wandering away over the surrounding faces, but he laughed in all the right places, and they just kept talking and smiling and smiling at each other. 

After a minute or two or twenty (seriously, could this guy hurry up and leave?), the stranger straightened up, and Nico touched a hand to his elbow in farewell, and then Tall and Anonymous wound a hand around Nico’s neck and pulled him onto his tiptoes to push his tongue into the Italian’s open mouth. 

A cold dead weight dropped hard into the pit of Will’s stomach. Piper turned at that moment and whatever she was about to say died in her throat as she followed his numb gaze. 

‘Oh, Will-’ she began as he belatedly tore his eyes away, ‘I- I don’t think he realises,’  
Will cleared his throat  
‘Realises what?’ He challenged, avoiding her eyes. He couldnt take the pity he could feel radiating off of her, and threw out an excuse about needing a piss before turning to push his way out of the crowd. 

He’d never seen Nico like that, and he didn‘t know what he’d been expecting, but it definitely wasn’t the needing way Nico had curled into the kiss, or his unabashed reciprocation of the mystery guy’s enthusiasm. Neither was it the contented smirk at the edges of Nico’s lips, like the cat that got the cream, nor the way Will had wished the ground would swallow him up right then and there. 

His brain whirred under the weight of all the new information. He couldn’t comprehend why there was such a sharp pain in his chest all of a sudden, didn’t even want to think about where it had come from. He just knew that if he stayed in that kitchen any longer his face would tell all their guests a secret so terrible he couldn’t even say it to himself. All he could focus on was trying to breathe, trying to get out, and trying to convince himself he hadn’t seen the hand that that guy had slid up beneath Nico’s shirt, and then he was alone in the bathroom without realising he’d gotten there, and when he met eyes with his reflection there were tears on his cheeks that he didn’t remember crying. 

The door he was leaning heavily against tried to open, and he gasped out a ‘Sorry-I’m-in-here,’ before the push came again with more force, and Piper’s voice rang out.  
‘Will, let me in,’ she said steadily and he caved, all the fight leaving his body. ‘Oh, baby,’ she frowned upon seeing him, and wrapped her arms fiercely around his shoulders.  
Will knew he’d passed the point of pretending, and let out a tiny pathetic noise. 

‘Listen, Will, I’m gonna leave you alone to think but I need to tell you he’s so stupid, he... I know he doesn’t like that guy and he doesn’t even realise that guy likes him. I-‘ her eyes crinkled sadly, ‘I don’t think he really believes anyone likes him, even his friends. But Will,’ she paused, and in those few seconds he could almost hear her debating with herself, ‘I’ve seen the way he looks at you,’ she said finally, ‘and you make him laugh more than I’ve seen him laugh in years. Why do you think he even shows up to these things? None of the rest of us can get him to dance. And he’s never said anything about liking you, which i think probably means he likes you so much it scares him.’ She looked pained, and Will’s lips were parted with silent shock. ‘I’m telling you this because i care about him very very fucking much and he deserves to be happy and you’re so good to him and you’re both so fucking stupid’ she continued pleadingly, and all the blonde could do was nod disjointedly, keeping eye contact so she knew he was sincere. Piper pulled him into another tight hug before leaving with a final word, ‘And I really don’t want you to think he likes that guy. Connor is a fucking asshole. He just likes being kissed.’

—

Will found himself back in party, which grew and then dwindled, as they all do, and through the night Will played the part. He laughed and danced and at one point found Nico’s hand in his on the dance floor. After twirling him once around, he let go and tried to ignore the way his dark brows furrowed. 

—

When Will had lost and found and lost each of his friends a few more times again, and the bulk of the crowd had moved on, he found himself in the emptying kitchen, and his eyes caught on the back door, ajar and exposing a slice of the deep grey world outside their golden sanctuary. He drifted over until he could feel the chill that was creeping in, and wasn’t overly surprised to find a hooded figure sat cross legged on the patio. Will slipped out to join Nico and folded himself onto the ground next to him. The younger boy didn’t look up, but produced a small ‘hey’ before returning his joint to his mouth and dragging a breath through it. Will returned a quiet greeting and accepted the hit Nico offered him. 

He could tell Nico wanted to forget something tonight, and he wanted to join him in that oblivious place. Nico didn’t break the silence, just kept taking hit after hit until he was heavy-lidded. When he’d snuffed his roach out on the cold concrete, Will’s hand found the back of his arm and he helped pull the boy to his feet, allowing him to lean lazily into his side. Together, they made their way back into the now deserted house and up the stairs, stumbling into Will’s dark bedroom. Nico giggled as he tripped over a chair leg and Will’s laugh came as a huff of air as he shot an arm back out to steady him. 

Had he not been as high as he was, Nico probably wouldn’t have sat as close to Will on his bed as he did. As it was, they were pressed together down the lengths of their shoulders and thighs, and it was too late to move away, which was a nuisance, as Nico kept catching himself leaning forwards like a magnet drawn to its opposite. They were stifling their delirious laughter over the shitty movie they’d put on, which Will was lucid enough to understand would not have been quite as funny sober, and Nico eventually couldn’t care that one of Will’s hands rested curled loosely around his exposed ankle. 

Nico realised in a tiny hopeful corner of his mind that his chest felt warm and light, and marvelled at the lack of that chilling anxious feeling he was so used to. This was easy. He couldn’t help being happy; Will was this cute sweet smart solid real boy, right there in front of him (he was perfect really, this was all he’d ever wanted), and with Will’s eyes dancing like that in the blue laptop-screen light, Nico felt his stomach flip with screaming want. 

The high was blurring out his edges, and when the credits started scrolling up the screen, Nico felt a thick blanket of tiredness cloak the room. Setting the laptop aside, the boys sank into an exhausted pile on the bed, barely content with the way all their limbs just barely touched. 

Will came to three hours later and recoiled at the taste of his own mouth. As he shifted, he realised Nico’s spine was pressed against his chest and froze, but the smaller boy was already stirring, and a second later mumbled out an ‘Ew’.  
Will let out the breath he was holding and croaked a desire to brush his teeth.  
‘Yeah. Me too. Fuck.’ Nico agreed, and wobbliy pushed himself upright. 

A minute later Will was leaning on his bathroom wall, and Nico against the sink, both methodically and dispassionately scrubbing at their teeth. Will waited patiently for Nico to rinse his mouth after he’d spat his own toothpaste, and when he finally shut off the water and turned to face him, neither boy made any attempt to move. 

Will’s mouth went dry. The image of Nico’s dark eyelashes dusting his cheeks while the stranger had kissed him at the party swam to the front of his mind. He wondered if he would be able to feel those eyelashes if they kissed right now, and then struggled to put that thought back where it came from. But then Nico looked up at him through the dark curls of his fringe, and he lost all self control. 

‘Can I kiss you?’ He blurted out, and Nico’s tired eyes widened as he swayed on his feet, but to Will’s surprise he was nodding jerkily before he could try to explain himself. Frozen, he watched Nico’s horror at his own eagerness flash across his face, and realised he must have answered without thinking.  
Placing a hand on the sink behind Nico to steady himself, and before either of them could torture themselves more, Will swallowed hard and closed the space, catching Nico’s lips in a soft kiss. Their mouths moved slowly together for one, two, three, four, five, six, seven seconds, making tiny noises into the quiet before breaking apart, and when they parted Nico’s breathing was shallow and uncertain. His head tipped forward until his forehead rested an inch from the taller boy’s chest. Will missed the warm brown of his eyes and longed to tilt his chin up and know what was he was thinking, but left the fragile silence to stretch into something sacred. Eventually, Nico’s head turned in an almost indiscernible movement and he crawled a delicate hand up to cheek level before leaning forward to tuck himself under the crook of Will’s neck, and Will pushed off from the sink and wound his arms securely around the tiny Italian’s waist. 

They stayed that way for some time, existing quietly together under the dim bathroom lights, Will watching their ghostly silhouette gaze back at him in the reflection of the tiles, until he felt a muffled yawn open against his chest. ‘Sleep,’ he muttered, bringing an his hand up to cup Nico’s jaw, and the younger boy nodded clumsily into his palm before allowing himself to be led back to Will’s bed. 

Will crawled back under the covers, pulling Nico along with him, limbs tangling together and both of them revelling in the warmth and closeness that was suddenly theirs to share. Once they’d settled, Nico, shaken out of his daze by the movement, felt those cold fingers tighten around his heart once more. He pulled his head away slightly, but couldn’t quite meet Will’s eyes. ‘What are we doing?’ he breathed out, and before the boy could answer he continued, ‘I mean... what does this mean?’ 

Will took a long second to gather his thoughts before answering, and he was so close and so quiet that Nico felt the words rather than heard them.  
‘I’ve liked you for a really really long time but I promise you there’s no rush and no pressure. I- I want to be with you and I know you don’t do casual and I really don’t either, Nico, I’m serious about you. But,’ he paused, and Nico waited while his chest rose and fell, ‘I would really like to just enjoy this? Can we take it slow and do all the stupid steps people do when they.. Um..’ he paused again, ‘Date each other?’ 

Barely daring to breathe, Nico nodded twice, two tiny jerks of his chin that made the pillow rustle against his ear and felt like the most difficult exertion, like his muscles were locked in place and all that tension was about to spill out of his eyes, his mouth. Will pulled Nico closer to him, clutching a fistful of the smaller boy’s t shirt in his hand. His smile was a tiny, pleased thing, and when Nico glanced up and saw it, Will pretended the room was too dark to see the way his cheeks turned pink. 

When Will spoke next, his voice was even lower than before, and caught itself on the edge of a whisper, but it resonated through Nico’s sternum. ‘So I can take you out on a date, then?’  
Nico summoned his voice.  
‘Yes please,’ he breathed out, and Will drank the words in like they were an offering from the gods. The blonde’s fingers curled into the soft hair at the nape of the other’s neck, and Nico didn’t realise how close their lips were until they fell together once more, open-mouthed and sleepy, in a world of their own under the duvet. 

—

Piper’s voice outside the bedroom door was entirely too loud for what Nico assumed the hour was. He had, however, slept through the day dawning, and as he adjusted back into his surroundings he became aware of someone’s arm slung across his waist, a firm chest against which his face was pressed, and a hand resting on the bare skin at the small of his back where the hem of his t shirt had crept up. Last nights events began to make themselves memories in his head as Will’s eyes opened blearily. 

‘Morning boys,’ Piper, bright and chipper, pushed Will’s door open and stepped inside, walking the length of the room to collect her bag from under Will’s desk. Nico refused to acknowledge her presence, choosing instead to bury his burning face in the other boy’s shirt, but he could hear the smug smile in her voice. ‘Nice sleepover?’ she asked sweetly. 

Will attempted to casually prop himself up on an elbow before answering. He slipped and hit himself in the face. ‘Mormph- I mean- morning Pipes’ Nico shoved a fist in his mouth. ‘Yeah good. I mean fine. I mean- we’ll be down in a minute.’  
Pipers voice came back strained and amused, ‘Well it’s already noon and I’m making pancakes, so try not to dawdle too much.’  
Will tried to reply but she was already out the door, and as soon as it closed Nico was shaking with laughter, pulling Will back down under the covers with him. 

-

‘Well?’ Lou looked expectantly at Piper as she re entered the kitchen, the small involuntary smile tugging on the corners of her mouth already indicating what news she had brought back.  
‘They were cuddling,’ she said triumphantly, the smile stealing across her face. Lou Ellen was skeptical.  
‘They always cuddle,’ she replied with a frown, but Piper shushed her.  
‘No, listen, exactly, when I went in Will was super embarrassed about it and tried to play it cool which was dumb as hell ‘cause,’ she stopped for breath, or maybe for dramatic effect, ‘why would I think it was anything except two bros cuddling as per usual unless it wasn’t!’  
Lou’s eyes grew to the size of saucers. ‘You’re right,’ she nodded, ‘Oh my god are they gonna come down here do we have to pretend everything’s normal????’  
‘Yes!’ Piper said quickly, ‘Please, we have to be calm and play it cool, try not to fucking laugh this time,’ she finished in a hushed tone, and Lou only had time to nod frantically before they heard two sets of footsteps on the stairs.


End file.
